Elsie is at stage four of the process. She is engaging in sober life and having difficult conversations with the people in her life who still enjoy drinking.
Situation: Engaging in sober life
Sober Goal: Original goal was to quit for 28 days now her goal is to keep going, she feels great.
Why: Elsie has been sober curious for a while, she challenged herself and hoped it would increase her energy and her zest for life. She made no plan to quit forever and has been relaxed enough to trust the process.
Elsie has been sober curious for a while now, she has read lots of books on the subject of alcohol and she has subscribed to several blogs.
She looks after her mental health, she knows the benefits, she is self-aware. Her curious nature encourages her to try new things without a guarantee they will work.
Elsie has always enjoyed holistic therapies, walks a lot, loves going on bike rides and morning yoga classes.
She loves a glass of red wine but really feels the effect for a few days if she has more than one so gave up her daily wine habit 6 weeks ago to see if her energy would increase.
It has and she is really starting to feel better about herself, she is finding everything much easier now.
Since she came out on social media about the sober challenge she has been amazed at the support she has received. People congratulate her on her MASSIVE achievement and although she agrees, she is suddenly starting to find it very easy.
Elsie has enjoyed learning about the sober process and has found it fascinating to learn so much about herself too. She's completed the activities in the programme and it has inspired her to start a creative writing course in the evenings which helps her to relax. (This is something she has wanted to do for YEARS)
Doing something just for her makes her feel better. She has been waiting for someone else to make her happy when she had the ability to do it herself all along. Elsie has avoided drama and gossip or getting involved in other peoples lives, she likes to isolate herself and she loves her own company. She doesn't see that as a bad thing now. Her dreams are full of travelling and adventures and as the weeks go by she feels more accepting of herself, more positive and more in control of her life.
Her mother now suffers from dementia so most of her time has been spent caring for her and feeling guilty when she can't be there. She often felt torn between her business, looking after her children and looking after her Mum.
She is very attractive with natural red hair, she is 52, she drinks because it's what she has always done. She enjoys the taste and she uses wine to relax and relieve stress.
She has met a new partner online since splitting up from her ex 3 years ago. Her friends encouraged her to 'make the effort' and she thought it was time to 'move on'. She doesn’t see as much of him as she would like as they both have busy lives. She isn't sure if she is in the right place for a relationship as she often feels she struggles to express what she wants from him, so she has held herself back.
She was embarrassed to tell him that she was thinking of cutting out booze, she didn't want him to assume she had a problem. She decided to keep it to herself, for now. She noticed after 10 days that she wasn't so tired and grumpy, after 6 weeks she finally recruited additional staff in her business.
She enjoys her days off as they are now filled with activities that she plans in advance.
On reflection, she has realised that she worked so hard because it was all she had in her life. She is happier and more fulfilled as her life is in balance now and she worries less. Elsie wasn't a heavy drinker, it is true even a little alcohol can impact your energy levels overall.
Elsie has spoken to other family members and they now have a rota and clear communication about who is visiting Mum and when. Elsie had felt weak physically and emotionally since her split from her ex. She had expected to grow old with him so when they split it shattered her beliefs of what her life would look like.
Elsie feels she is always filing the needs of others before her own, yet she feels guilt for feeling this. Her life seems to be a lot of deadlines and difficult people leaving her feeling frazzled. At the beginning of the process, she described herself as overworked and underappreciated.
After many months of struggling with this, once she quit drinking and took time to reflect on her thoughts and feelings, Elsie reached out for coaching. She has learnt so much about herself, in this process especially that she is responsible for her own well being. She actively seeks daily activities that improve her wellbeing and is no longer afraid to reach out and ask for help.